Confuse

If you have a strong relationship ever..would it be useful for your future? or it just an obstruction for yourself to achieve a good life? Such a weird world we living in. When you get what you want, and suddenly you just threw it away..such an idiot person to make a decision like that isn't it? What kind of person are you? Are you the one who appreciate a long lasting relationship or you are the the type of person that I discuss about? But somehow in this wide world, I believe that there is still a person who did care about other people feeling no matter how they met each other or what brings them together. All they need is lesson and a good karma. Every gentleman need a decent lady, how about the vice versa? God plan is very interesting isn't it?

2015

Everything seems new..feels like yesterday all that black history crushed and destroy my life in a blink of eyes. And yeah..its 2015, new book and new life as usual. A cliche question..What is your new year resolutions? My answer would be...fix the past. As you know, you need to be good to your past so you can make a great move for your future, and for sure i want to be happy and not being lonely. Its hard living in a world that you yourself couldn't understand. Me..myself also haven't figure out what happen in a year or two.. everything went by so fast like a roller coaster and you wouldn't know when its stop. I am not sure whether i need to feel the happiness or just lonely. How about you?

blank note for ex

Although you no longer mine I cant never forget you The way you call my name Feel as if you're still there Deep in my heart You still have me For me..right here i always pray for you So that you will not continue to hurt yourself anymore You're happy encounter Although I was not there with you Don't be mad.. I will always be there From a distance you'll mine From a distance I still loving you One world, against our love Finally we separated... I am not regret loving you I wish you well in life

There's a difference between giving up and knowing you've had enough

This is not a goodbye, my darling, this is a thank you. Thank you for coming into my life and giving me joy, thank you for loving me and receiving my love in return. Thank you for the memories I will cherish forever. But most of all, thank you for showing me that there will come a time when I can eventually let you go.Sometimes we have to give up on someone in order to respect ourselves rather than keep accepting things and words we dont really deserve.

Vervain

All this talk of getting old It's getting me down my love Like a cat in a bag, waiting to drown This time I'm comin' down And I hope you're thinking of me As you lay down on your side Now the drugs don't work They just make you worse But I know I'll see your face again Now the drugs don't work They just make you worse But I know I'll see your face again But I know I'm on a losing streak 'Cause I passed down my old street And if you wanna show, then just let me know And I'll sing in your ear again ;) 'Cause baby, ooh, if heaven calls, I'm coming, too Just like you said, you leave my life, I'm better off dead Now the drugs don't work They just make you worse But I know I'll see your face again Yeah, I know I'll see your face again Yeah, I know I'll see your face again Yeah, I know I'll see your face again Yeah, I know I'll see your face again I'm never going down, I'm never coming down No more, no more, no more, no more, no more I'm never coming down, I'm never going down No more, no more, no more, no more, no more

I AM ANGEL..ON MY OWN

GETTING STRONGER..STAND ON MY OWN FEET..NO MORE GUARDIAN BESIDE ME...IT JUST A PHASE..HAVE FAITH ON YOURSELF ANGEL. PROMISE TO WEAR THAT 'SMILE' ATTIRE...NO MORE FROWN PLEASE. DREAMS STAY AS DREAM. ANGEL AFTER THIS WILL NOT PUT MORE HOPE ON OTHERS..SHE WILL PUT HOPE ON HERSELF.

the flightless bird

This keyboard feels so new, so interesting, almost like I've never told a story here before.its been awhile..

Life has a funny way of making you feel special and at the very next moment, taking it that feeling right from inside of you. I fell in love again today and it keeps happening. I hate the thought of loving this guy so much that I almost seem to forget myself and at the end of the day, I question the idea of what I want, where I wanna go and more importantly, who I am.

I spend my days either work or with him. We practically do nothing but the best part is that we don't really have to. Like how we spent a whole night just watching movies and laughing in each others' arms and I remember thinking to myself how grateful I am that I could be that way with someone and especially with him.

Though all this, I am constantly plagued with the idea that he would eventually hurt me, that he would eventually find someone better and leave. Maybe it's only my insecurities or maybe it's because it has happened before but he's one person I am actually afraid of losing.

I don't know, maybe it's just me. Or maybe, because, somewhere deep down inside of me, you already hurt me.

Just saying..

i cant give you a branded things just like her did...

i cant give you a perfect conversation like her did...

i cant cheer you up like her did...

but..i only can give you my heart...

i am sorry. im not perfect...

but i always put on effort on something i did..

I'm just saying...

how i wish i can be like her...

give whatever you want...

i am not jealous... i'm dispirited

"May the new year gives you a taste of common sense so that you never make resolutions again"

2011 are about to take a bow...

2012..hye.

2011 just nice.

financial- not so perfect..But Alhamdulillah im not dying for food or shelter

Life- Standard for homosapiens :D :l :( :) ;p

Overall 2011 keep making me stronger. I am a weaker. LOL.

Eventhough no vacation on 2011, i still can handle myself or else err..

2011 full of laughter, sadness, madness, greatness, gloomness, happiness, romance errrrr....

i forgive...i know i dont easily forget.but i am trying. :) i'm not that evil and bitch as people thought...:)

And for sure 2012..it is a good chance to make a big steps towards myself. Hope i will find my true soulmate. And that person will guide me towards happiness and full of romance!

To person that i care, May throughout 2012 you adorn the most beautiful attire called "Smile" .. cuz i cant live with those messy frown!


packing up all 2011!

Well, with full embrace you are most welcome 2012. Cant wait for it .

With Love,

Miss M

who will be the FUTURE?

no one can tell.

smile like the world never ends..

dance like nobody watching....

pray.pray.pray.

destiny cant be changed...

But..who knew..

Dear Above

Dear above,

I will always pray for everyone..

Joy

Happiness

Bless

Wealth

Health

Fortunately

Please throw away my sense of arrogant, demonic, greedy, my bad side dear above..


Ordinary people want ordinary life.

No one can promise a good happy life nor the perfect one.

Throw away dishonest behavior. Fraudulent is not good at all.


Dear above,

i'm grateful for what i have

Guide me to your path..

there's some crack in my faith..i am just a little creature dear above...

Thats Her

“Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat, or will stay awake just to watch you sleep… wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in track pants, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you’re just as pretty without makeup on. One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky he is to have YOU… The one who turns to his friends and says, “thats her”….”

The Sun is Shining Back

I love when it is a word of simple life you apply in your life. A small attention would probably make someone you like being lovable to you.

Your warm embrace make her feel safe and secure again.

Your smile, tell her that you are happy again and you get what she was trying to tell you before.

Your kindness make her fall for you again. A little appreciation to your little angel make a big ones in her heart.

She is keep holding on because of the above signs that her guardian angel are back.

Is it going to be last?

Beautiful Metaphoric

Can I?

make you smile?

make you laugh?

make you happy?

accept your flaws?

love you?

grow old with you?

have fun with you?

understand you?

be there when you have a hard time?

make you breakfast?

be there when you get home?

can I / you ?

:)

Touchable lullaby

As I were asleep. I heard 'takbir' out from nowhere and I realize its Eid Adha . I miss my family . I just wanna go home. I miss my real family. I don't have any family in here. I cry ..because I am a loner..I wish I have my family in here .

.CRAWLING.SHIVERING.

Hello new life..maybe it is not the end of you little angel..keep on walking if you cant fly..keep on crawling if you cant walk. Face this big world in a small body of you. Keep on breathing. There might be a shiny light focus for you if you are hoping for it. head up, chin up little angel. Plan your day as usual. Find a little happiness from a true friends. Have fun with life,go out travel, don't ever fall in love with guy. It hurts you so bad little angel. Fly alone maybe risky for you but it is better than to have someone beside you, one is simple. Never ever fall in love little angel. That is lesson you get, first and last. You cant rewind it and fix it. Remember little angel, life is too grudge to you to handle. Your no longer little angel, you are angel on your own.

I'm a DREAMER

Life become dull again and again. I am loner now. It is November. And November i was hoping for a happiness. But will my wish granted? who knew. Yeah.. i demand for a healthy good life. But it is sounds like mission impossible to me. I can't make it . And now i am falling..again and again . Once i stop care about person called GUY .

I wish my life was like a Hollywood movie ..as though as P.S I Love you but life is ain't that easy to forget someone you love.

Shout out from Little Angel

I'm not supposed to love you, I'm not supposed to care. I'm not supposed to live my life wishing you were there. I'm not supposed to wonder where you are and what you do. I'm sorry, I can't help it, I'm so in love with you.

I know I shouldn't like him because I know it's not working and so I convince myself I don't. I see him and he'll put his arm around me or just say anything and then, all that logic and convincing, just evaporates.

It hurts to breathe, because evry breath I take proves that I can live without you.

I guess when your heart gets broken, you begin to see the cracks in everything.

Falling for someone at the first time is easy...it's the second time, after you have fallen and trusted someone to catch you and they didn't...when it becomes difficult to fall again.

I could fill a thousand pages telling you how I felt and still you would understand. So now I leave you without a sound, except my heart shattering as it hits the ground.

How does a heart work if it's broke?

I never stopped loving you, I just stopped letting it show.

I keep myself busy with things to do, but everytime I pause, I still think of you.

I wish he meant it when he kissed my lips, because then I could look back and remember someone loved me, instead I can only look back and remember someone used me.

Hearts will never be made practical until they can be made unbreakable.

Sometimes I wish I was a little kid again, skinned knees are easier to fix rather then broken hearts.

Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to be sure of keeping it intact, you must give it to no one. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries, avoid all entanglements, lock it up safe in the casket of your selfishness, but in that casket - safe, dark, motionless, airless - it will change. It will not be broken, it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.

Love, the perfect virture, is often refused to the teenager. "They don't know what love is." We do. Every teenager knows how much they loved by how deeply they hurt when the relationship is over.

I'll always love him. He carved out his piece of me that I can never get back and even if I could, it wouldn't matter because he has torn it to shreds. So now there's this hole that only he can fill. The thing is, I know he'll never ever fill it, because now he's off with some other things and he forgot the way back into my heart. If only he'd call and ask for directions.

My once upon a time, didn't end happily ever after,

I thought I forgot you, but I guess I forgot to.

I never knew it hurt so much to lose something I never had.

Sometimes you just have to hold your head up high, try not to cry, and say goodbye.

The sky isn't always blue, the sun doesn't always shine, it's alright to fall apart sometimes.

All they do is break your heart and I'm not sure I have a heart left to break.

I'm only happy when it rains.

All i want is to be in love. I dream of falling asleep in the arms of guardian angel and waking up to complete happiness and utter bliss, why can't I have that?

Tell me how long till I'm not just dreaming, how long till somebody cares, how long till I meet my guardian angel? Tell me how long till I fall in love?

I know I should find someone new, but all I find is myself thinking of you.

I never felt love until I loved you. I never felt hurt until I was hurt by you. I never had a dream until that dream was you. I never felt loss until the day I lost you. Yet I don't want you back. I don't need you here. I don't miss you at all...you're just the best thing that I ever had.

Perhaps you'd be a bit surprised how often, if you knew, a joke, a song, a memory will make me think of you.

How come whenever I think I'm over you, you talk to me and make me feel like I'm the most loved person in the world. And I realize I still love you nd I can't or won't get over you.

I'm not the kind of girl who thinks a guys is the answer to everything...I'm just tired of being alone.

I yearn for a love that won't burn me in the end.

One of the hardest things in life is having words in your heart you can't utter from your mouth.

I've been broken before, I know what it's like to see something funny and not laugh.

You met me. You introduced yourself to me. You were a friend to me. You grew fond of me. You grew to appreciate me. You liked me. You asked me. I answered. You held me. You touched me. You needed me. You wanted me. You loved me. You grew tired of me. You felt trapped by me. You lied to me. You cheated on me. You hurt me. You left me.

It's kinda hard to go out with someone, when you know, deep down, you're still in love with someone else. Its really tough and i cant imagine how am i to falling in love with another person again and again.

Tears are words the heart can't say.

We came to be underneath the stars above, what started out as liking quickly turned to love. I sensed a certain something, that mine was true, I knew I waited my enitre life to fall in love with someone like you.

They say that it is better to have loved and lost then to never have loved at all, but what do they say when you are still in love with the love you lost?

If it's true that love begins with a smile, grows with a kiss, and ends with a tear. Why did we get out of order. My tears came before your kiss that I am still waiting for.

I'll have another chance, I'll find another guy, I'll see another day and I'll build another world and I'll find another life, just like you told me to, I'll find another love, but there will never be...another you.


Crushes you get over and the tears go away, but loving you is different, the treats will always stay.

You see my soul, it's kind of gray. You see my heart, you look away. You see my wrist, I feel your pain. You know my cheeks aren't just wet from the rain.

Sticks and stones may break my bones and rip my skin apart, but no one has hurt me like you, you really broke my heart.

Words cannot fully express the extent of my love for him. But if you saw the way I cried when he left me, then perhaps you'd understand.

Now I know I have a heart because I can feel it breaking.

I sit alone and cry. It is my destiny to be the queen of pain.

Between my love and agony, my thoughts converge to you.

I never understood why people thought loved sucked, until I met you.

It's easy to convince yourself that you aren't in love with someone, until you see them or smell someone wearing their cologne, and then you're like, 'here we go again.' So my conclusion is this: you don't ever stop loving someone.It's more a matter of learning to deal with the pain of not having them anymore.

i wont feel better until it stop..I cant feel you anymore!

I still can feel it. Be sure to change your life ~because i am getting tired and bored. Do i have to mention what is your problem?i don't think so. You know what is going on. I keep silent because i hate fight. I hate arguing. So i just leave you with your kind of situation. I am happy with my life now even though i have nothing. My life become clean. i can do it...why not you ? it makes me feel i am on my way to hate you. You still have a lot of peeps who will take care of you and destroying your day. But all of this thing start within voice deep inside your heart, if it is bring you into wrong path,then its up to you to decide. They say love can change a person..but not you. Hard as stone,but think back when that stone hit you back. Feel any better? Well peeps can heal it right?! boohoo! .

Pray for your happiness. Hope you will change someday.

You never realize what you have until its gone

That title is what my housemate told me last 2 days. She is going back to her hometown and never came back here again. Thank God, she has a supportive family who always support her in whatever she does. Love make her sick. She is independent yet cheerful girl but when came in love situation she became so weak and sick. Struggle to get a new life is hard but it is better for her to moved on. But its normal...'You never realize what you have until its gone'
That words she gave to the person who once was take her heart and melt her into a soft person. But then soft things can become hard like a rock once it left to and abandoned. And that hard things will hit you back. Am i going to be like her? I am not strong anymore. I just have faith..if there is no faith i will end up like her. Start from now, i wont take care of other feelings, i just concern on mine. Maybe its sounds a bit selfish, but who else going to take care of your own feeling. I am tired to taking a good care of other person feeling while they don't give a damn about it. My patience is way too low already. Sorry. I am too much swallowing what you have gave to me. Bitter or sweet. My bad..keep on silent and keep holding on.
Okay back to reality~!!


I and others will feel gloom without her..our stylista sister. I will miss you. Thanks for the dress!