For U ... I Will.

I almost gave up on making something of myself.
My emotions and thoughts had no connection, no communication with each other.
I had troubles dealing with things harder than i could handle.
My beliefs were a haywire.
My life was just as complicated as the situation we were going through.

My hopes and desires went flying out the window like a paper plane.
I wasn't in the position of starting something new, i had so much to deal with.
Whether it was alone or whether it had to do with someone else, i wasn't in.
My mind, my soul just wasn't there.
I felt emptiness empowering my body inch by inch and i couldn't do anything to stop it.

My problems and my inner voice kept telling me things i didn't want to hear.
I would scream just to try and keep them silenced but nothing ever worked.
I had to try to overcome something so strong, something so evil.
I had to overcome myself.

In the most hardest of times, when i felt down and i didn't want to continue even when someone pulled me up from the ground, dust me off and pushed me my way, i didn't move an inch.
When i was falling deeper and deeper into the hole i created for my insecurities, pain and judgement, i couldn't flex a muscle.
The furthest i'd go for myself was when i blinked my eye to help my tears run easier.
Even my tears needed a push to run it's way down my cheek, and straight to the floor.

Don't take this the wrong way.
I never needed help from anyone and i didn't need it from you.
I was never the kind of person that wanted to be taken care of.
I was always the girl that held her head up high even when i felt lower than soil.
I am a fighter, a born get-goer.
I never needed butterflies to keep me afloat, nor fishes in the sea to keep me swimming.

Once upon a time, i felt like a nobody and paranoia came naturally to me.
But that was once upon a time.
And unlike a fairytale beginning, i won't end this with a fairytale ending.
I'll make my life a full one, i'll go crazy and let go.
I'll fulfill my dreams and create something more for myself.
I will climb my highest lows and get through everyday like a cross-country.
It will cut me, bruise me and try to bring me down, but i have my dignity and my will power and i will continue to keep going even if i had one last breath to breathe.

That's what you call fighting and i'll definitely be the last one standing.