Monday, October 31, 2011

.CRAWLING.SHIVERING.


Hello new life..maybe it is not the end of you little angel..keep on walking if you cant fly..keep on crawling if you cant walk. Face this big world in a small body of you. Keep on breathing. There might be a shiny light focus for you if you are hoping for it. head up, chin up little angel. Plan your day as usual. Find a little happiness from a true friends. Have fun with life,go out travel, don't ever fall in love with guy. It hurts you so bad little angel. Fly alone maybe risky for you but it is better than to have someone beside you, one is simple. Never ever fall in love little angel. That is lesson you get, first and last. You cant rewind it and fix it. Remember little angel, life is too grudge to you to handle. Your no longer little angel, you are angel on your own.

I'm a DREAMER


Life become dull again and again. I am loner now. It is November. And November i was hoping for a happiness. But will my wish granted? who knew. Yeah.. i demand for a healthy good life. But it is sounds like mission impossible to me. I can't make it . And now i am falling..again and again . Once i stop care about person called GUY .

I wish my life was like a Hollywood movie ..as though as P.S I Love you but life is ain't that easy to forget someone you love.

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Shout out from Little Angel


I'm not supposed to love you, I'm not supposed to care. I'm not supposed to live my life wishing you were there. I'm not supposed to wonder where you are and what you do. I'm sorry, I can't help it, I'm so in love with you.

I know I shouldn't like him because I know it's not working and so I convince myself I don't. I see him and he'll put his arm around me or just say anything and then, all that logic and convincing, just evaporates.

It hurts to breathe, because evry breath I take proves that I can live without you.

I guess when your heart gets broken, you begin to see the cracks in everything.

Falling for someone at the first time is easy...it's the second time, after you have fallen and trusted someone to catch you and they didn't...when it becomes difficult to fall again.

I could fill a thousand pages telling you how I felt and still you would understand. So now I leave you without a sound, except my heart shattering as it hits the ground.

How does a heart work if it's broke?

I never stopped loving you, I just stopped letting it show.

I keep myself busy with things to do, but everytime I pause, I still think of you.

I wish he meant it when he kissed my lips, because then I could look back and remember someone loved me, instead I can only look back and remember someone used me.

Hearts will never be made practical until they can be made unbreakable.

Sometimes I wish I was a little kid again, skinned knees are easier to fix rather then broken hearts.

Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to be sure of keeping it intact, you must give it to no one. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries, avoid all entanglements, lock it up safe in the casket of your selfishness, but in that casket - safe, dark, motionless, airless - it will change. It will not be broken, it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.

Love, the perfect virture, is often refused to the teenager. "They don't know what love is." We do. Every teenager knows how much they loved by how deeply they hurt when the relationship is over.

I'll always love him. He carved out his piece of me that I can never get back and even if I could, it wouldn't matter because he has torn it to shreds. So now there's this hole that only he can fill. The thing is, I know he'll never ever fill it, because now he's off with some other things and he forgot the way back into my heart. If only he'd call and ask for directions.

My once upon a time, didn't end happily ever after,

I thought I forgot you, but I guess I forgot to.

I never knew it hurt so much to lose something I never had.

Sometimes you just have to hold your head up high, try not to cry, and say goodbye.

The sky isn't always blue, the sun doesn't always shine, it's alright to fall apart sometimes.

All they do is break your heart and I'm not sure I have a heart left to break.

I'm only happy when it rains.

All i want is to be in love. I dream of falling asleep in the arms of guardian angel and waking up to complete happiness and utter bliss, why can't I have that?

Tell me how long till I'm not just dreaming, how long till somebody cares, how long till I meet my guardian angel? Tell me how long till I fall in love?

I know I should find someone new, but all I find is myself thinking of you.

I never felt love until I loved you. I never felt hurt until I was hurt by you. I never had a dream until that dream was you. I never felt loss until the day I lost you. Yet I don't want you back. I don't need you here. I don't miss you at all...you're just the best thing that I ever had.

Perhaps you'd be a bit surprised how often, if you knew, a joke, a song, a memory will make me think of you.

How come whenever I think I'm over you, you talk to me and make me feel like I'm the most loved person in the world. And I realize I still love you nd I can't or won't get over you.

I'm not the kind of girl who thinks a guys is the answer to everything...I'm just tired of being alone.

I yearn for a love that won't burn me in the end.

One of the hardest things in life is having words in your heart you can't utter from your mouth.

I've been broken before, I know what it's like to see something funny and not laugh.

You met me. You introduced yourself to me. You were a friend to me. You grew fond of me. You grew to appreciate me. You liked me. You asked me. I answered. You held me. You touched me. You needed me. You wanted me. You loved me. You grew tired of me. You felt trapped by me. You lied to me. You cheated on me. You hurt me. You left me.

It's kinda hard to go out with someone, when you know, deep down, you're still in love with someone else. Its really tough and i cant imagine how am i to falling in love with another person again and again.

Tears are words the heart can't say.

We came to be underneath the stars above, what started out as liking quickly turned to love. I sensed a certain something, that mine was true, I knew I waited my enitre life to fall in love with someone like you.

They say that it is better to have loved and lost then to never have loved at all, but what do they say when you are still in love with the love you lost?

If it's true that love begins with a smile, grows with a kiss, and ends with a tear. Why did we get out of order. My tears came before your kiss that I am still waiting for.

I'll have another chance, I'll find another guy, I'll see another day and I'll build another world and I'll find another life, just like you told me to, I'll find another love, but there will never be...another you.


Crushes you get over and the tears go away, but loving you is different, the treats will always stay.

You see my soul, it's kind of gray. You see my heart, you look away. You see my wrist, I feel your pain. You know my cheeks aren't just wet from the rain.

Sticks and stones may break my bones and rip my skin apart, but no one has hurt me like you, you really broke my heart.

Words cannot fully express the extent of my love for him. But if you saw the way I cried when he left me, then perhaps you'd understand.

Now I know I have a heart because I can feel it breaking.

I sit alone and cry. It is my destiny to be the queen of pain.

Between my love and agony, my thoughts converge to you.

I never understood why people thought loved sucked, until I met you.

It's easy to convince yourself that you aren't in love with someone, until you see them or smell someone wearing their cologne, and then you're like, 'here we go again.' So my conclusion is this: you don't ever stop loving someone.It's more a matter of learning to deal with the pain of not having them anymore.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

i wont feel better until it stop..I cant feel you anymore!


I still can feel it. Be sure to change your life ~because i am getting tired and bored. Do i have to mention what is your problem?i don't think so. You know what is going on. I keep silent because i hate fight. I hate arguing. So i just leave you with your kind of situation. I am happy with my life now even though i have nothing. My life become clean. i can do it...why not you ? it makes me feel i am on my way to hate you. You still have a lot of peeps who will take care of you and destroying your day. But all of this thing start within voice deep inside your heart, if it is bring you into wrong path,then its up to you to decide. They say love can change a person..but not you. Hard as stone,but think back when that stone hit you back. Feel any better? Well peeps can heal it right?! boohoo! .

Pray for your happiness. Hope you will change someday.

Thursday, October 20, 2011

You never realize what you have until its gone

That title is what my housemate told me last 2 days. She is going back to her hometown and never came back here again. Thank God, she has a supportive family who always support her in whatever she does. Love make her sick. She is independent yet cheerful girl but when came in love situation she became so weak and sick. Struggle to get a new life is hard but it is better for her to moved on. But its normal...'You never realize what you have until its gone'
That words she gave to the person who once was take her heart and melt her into a soft person. But then soft things can become hard like a rock once it left to and abandoned. And that hard things will hit you back. Am i going to be like her? I am not strong anymore. I just have faith..if there is no faith i will end up like her. Start from now, i wont take care of other feelings, i just concern on mine. Maybe its sounds a bit selfish, but who else going to take care of your own feeling. I am tired to taking a good care of other person feeling while they don't give a damn about it. My patience is way too low already. Sorry. I am too much swallowing what you have gave to me. Bitter or sweet. My bad..keep on silent and keep holding on.
Okay back to reality~!!


I and others will feel gloom without her..our stylista sister. I will miss you. Thanks for the dress!

Making the other happy


Life are always incomplete.When you are happy everything is alright.But when it become a darkest day of your life everything will be feel unacceptable and ignorance. How was it feels when karma hits you back? I feel in my life, no everyone understands me, and I don't understand all people too. I think it is normal. Sometimes I have a problem with the other, maybe I make or the other makes. I don't think to judge that someone is good or bad, because everyone changes and changes. I can't say that in one life, one person will not make a mistake. Everyone can do it.

Not all people are happy in their life, some are happy and some are not happy. Some pass the life with sad, he doesn't have good friend, he is poor, he is ugly, he is difficult, he don't have good skills because he doesn't have a chance to be better. He feels that life is very difficult for him. I don't agree that everyone can make lucky in their life. Some people can't get the lucky, even he has worked hard. I don't want to abuse him, don't want to give so many reasons. Life is life.

Everyone wants to be happy including me. Everyone wants to be a cinderella, a person's life changes in one night. Everyone hopes to have a beautiful life, have good friends, be lucky and never suffered.

I want to be happy, the other wants to be happy too. I want to make someone happy because when he is happy I become happy too. Like as a case. A poor and ugly woman, she wants to get married, but she and her boyfriend don't have money. If an angel comes to her, gives her a beauty and money, she will be very happy. She will feel very lucky and she pass her marriage happily. Like as flowers blossoms in the park.


I want that someone changes in his life. I don't want that someone is sad in his life because sadness make life much more difficult.

Flowers blossom in the park. When the park is arid, the park is very ugly. When the flowers blossom, everyone can see red, yellow, white, purple, blue and the other colors. It is really beautiful.Yes,it is...

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Life is too short to hold a grudge..also too long


I wish I could believe you then I'll be alright
But now everything you told me really don't apply
To the way I feel inside
Loving you was easy once upon a time..
But now my suspicions of you have multiplied
And it's all because you lied

I only give you a hard time...
Cause I cant go on and pretend like
I haven't tried to forget this
But I'm much too full of resentment

Just can't seem to get over the way you hurt me
Don't know how you gave another who didn't mean a thing, no
With everything you gave to me
I thought I could forgive you and I know you've changed
As much as I wanna trust you I know it ain't the same

I only give you a hard time...
Cause I cant go on and pretend like
I haven't tried to forget this
But I'm much too full of resentment

I may never understand why
I'm doing the best that I can and I
I tried and I tried to forget this
I'm much too full of resentment

I'll always remember feeling like I was NO GOOD
Like I couldn't do it for you like your mistress could

Loved you more than ever
More than my own life
The best part of me I gave you
Lived with Sacrifice
And it's all because I ...huh.

I only give you a hard time
Cause I cant go on and pretend like
I tried and I tried to forget this
But I'm too damn full of resentment

I know she was attractive but I was here first
Been ridin' with you for a years why did I deserve
To be treated this way by you, you
I know your probably thinking what's up with me
I been crying for too long what did you do to me
I used to be so strong but now you took my soul
I'm crying cant stop crying cant stop crying
You could of told me that you wasn't happy
I know you didn't wanna hurt me
But look what you done-done to me now
I gotta look at her in her eyes and see she's half of me
How could you...

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

ALL AT ONCE I WILL STOP CARING

This patience is killing me inside slowly..

i cant stop thinking about it.

i am so in pain due to this matters.

i cant take it anymore..

i can smell lies miles away from here..

Love song cannot cure this pain..it hurts so much.

Help..let me go. This is so bad...really bad..

I try to make it clean and legal. Back to the way it was...But i just cant...negative aura linger around.

i just cant get through this anymore... atleast i am trying. I AM TRYING SO HARD. indeed.

Maybe i am not the one who can enjoy bad things with you.because i am normal.

I want a normal life for God sake. ;/

All at once i will stop care about you. I will..arghh..I try. (i know i just cant..but i try and i will.)

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

“If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow”


I try to be strong and face all my day without feel any sadness and regret. I am trying...

Lord, forgive all my sins.. Give me happiness..

Lord, give me a good health to make people around me happy on what i am doing..

Lord, prosperity are not easy to earn..but Lord, make me strong and courageous.

Amin~